List #2 is the shopping list for the weekend. List #3 is things to prepare for the next church newsletter.
I am staring at the lists. As if life can be boxed in like that.
Look, I treat life like a list of things “to-do,” instead of a “to-be” list. I am so dreadfully at risk — at risk of being a human doing, instead of human being. It’s not all bad. I mean, you can count on me to get things done. I am a planner. I meet deadlines. If I say I’m going to do something, I will.
But I also live life avoiding the spontaneous act that might derail my well-laid plans. I screen calls. I miss fun lunches with girlfriends. I wonder: how many miracles have I missed between the lines on the list?
I am staring upwards at the ceiling again. And I swear to you: It was like God was looking down at me, with His arms crossed over His burly chest, with his holy head tilted, and one eyebrow raised. I can’t say for sure, but He might have been smirking.
What if you focused more on a 'to-be' list? Put the 'to-do' list down for a while... Okay, I knew He was talking to me.
Come and be with me...
What if...? What if I awoke to wonder...
What if I remembered that days are mere blips? It's not a moment of heart panicking desperation to experience mistakes deeply. Bad days are opportunities for reflection or just simply bad days.
What if I could live more poetry in my own skin? I should be able to just go outside and enjoy God's gift of sunshine without thinking about all the things I am not getting done.
What if I colored outside the lines? Aidan, my 5 year old does it all the time in his coloring books. I don't have to follow the rules of order all the time.
What if my best work isn’t in a sealed room, but somewhere under a frozen sky, where the wind blows wild through my hair? I am inspired just thinking about it.
What if I took one giant leap outside my safe 'to-do' lists, risked tripping over my words, made a holy mess of things and then laughed about it later with friends?
The big what if is this one...
What if I just made more time to be with Him? In the sunshine of spring days, in the glow of a really good book, in the excitement of a lunch with a good friend, in a conversation... These all lead into His presence if I really think about.
What if I just let go of the 'to-do' list for today? After all, we are only required 'to-be' with Him.