​It's a bit of an odd month with the Kim Clan. Aidan had some trouble at school recently with his teacher and I am at a loss to understand the man. A few weeks ago, my husband got a phone call where he was told that Aidan was under disciplinary action for swearing. My husband was shocked and questioned Aidan about the incident at school.

It turns out it is quite possibly the teacher and the system that should be put under disciplinary action. There was a girl in class who brushed up against Aidan and put her hand extremely close to his private parts. Aidan, of course, reacted to this, saying "Sexual assault!" The teacher noticed the interaction and asked the girl what she was doing. The girl, of course, denied everything, and the teacher took her side. This, apparently, pushed Aidan over the edge and profanities came out of his mouth. This incident had been a series in a long time of interactions with the teacher where Aidan's voice was not heard. I believe all of the frustrations of not having the teacher hear you or protect you proved too much for him.

Of course, Aidan was punished for swearing. He is an extremely bright kid who needs to take a little less pleasure in the insulting language he and his friends engage in.

It turns out that in Korean culture, when a child gets in trouble at school, he or she is required to write out what happened in the presence of the teacher and the principal. And this is what resulted with this incident. My husband seems to think that a parent should also be involved in this process. He made quite the point of asking Aidan a long series of questions to make sure he understood what had happened as clearly as possible. Aidan had to amend or change quite a bit of his statement.

Because this is a potential sexual harassment case, Hansung (my husband) made some phone calls. The calls were made to different authorities. Information was gathered. and Aidan was told to not sign any other documents at school. 

The child had to defend himself to the Parents Advisory Council on Monday. He just kept repeating that he swore but he did not swear at the teacher. 

Two days later, the teacher approached him about what he wrote. Aidan said he wasn't going to sign anything. The teacher told him to just read it. Apparently, Aidan corrected something, signed the paper, and sent it to his Dad.

My husband was not pleased that Aidan had signed the paper. We spent most of the evening trying to understand how Aidan had been manipulated until my husband just looked at him and said, "You are not somebody!" I believe he just wanted Aidan to acknowledge that he had not listened to his father.

That was a terrible night. I had three different things due at the end of the week. My mind had been in stuck in public policy for English Language learners until it was rudely interrupted with the ongoing saga of what was going on with Aidan. 

And that is where we leave this unfortunately tale as it is not finished yet. And I just keep coming back to the stories Aidan told about his teacher before the whole thing happened and how nobody really liked him. 

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On a much lighter note, Jordan brings a smile to my face with his little boy smile and little boy ways. I really love that he always runs up to me and gives me a hug when he sees me outside. He is always polite, saying goodbye to me in the morning and announcing when he has come home. 

Jordan's teacher is pleased with his work at school and with him. His teacher is a Christian and commented to my husband about Jordan when they were doing street crossing duty in the morning. 

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On a much lighter note, today is Justin's birthday. He turns 18. I just keep smiling when I realize that by Canadian law he is considered an adult. We will have a meal of pork ribs later today as this is what he asked for. Afterwards, there is a plan to go to Baskin Robbins 31 for ice cream. I am just praying that the positive energy from Justin's birthday is going to outweigh all the negative crap from this week. 

On June 25th, eighteen years ago, I was at the doctor's for a prenatal check. We were back at the doctors just a few hours later. That beautiful boy was born in the evening around 8:00. I remember the angels dancing around the room when they placed that sweet bundle beside me in the recovery room. He was sleepy, but he smiled.

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What stories do you have about what is going on in your life? I would love to hear all about it! 

Every evening I spend about 20-25 minutes reading books to my children. And every evening the boys surprise me with their growing repertoire of English words. It is their behavior during this time that makes me want to laugh and cry at the same time. The enchanted hour is never as enchanted as I believe it could be. 

The Mr. Putter and Tabby series by Cynthia Rylant has been on regular rotation. Jordan, my youngest, took to rolling over his brother right after we read about how Mr. Putter's neighbor's dog rolled in the grass and wrapped himself around trees. Life met art instantaneously.

In fact, the rolling has become a regular thing for Jordan. Aidan just has to read one page from any book before Jordan rolls. And I am pleasantly surprised how patient Aidan is with this annoyance from his brother. He just seems to hold his breath and let Jordan roll on him. 

Jordan also likes to place his hands under people shirts and softly touch the skin. I think the skin-to-skin connection reassures him. I am okay with this most of the time, but Aidan is not. When the rolling expands into this touching/tickling/feeling, Aidan gets upset. "Stop! I don't like it!" Jordan, of course, says "Okay!" and then proceeds to touch Mom. 

But when I think about it, I know I am going to look back on this time and just be nostalgic for it. I will just remember it as cute! 

We also read Bible stories.

Jordan and I are reading the Jesus Calling Bible Storybook. Jordan likes the pictures and the stories are kind of short, which suits Jordan quite well.

Aidan and I are reading the Action Bible. This Bible is more like a graphic novel. Aidan was completely overwhelmed when we started to read it mainly because it is just a really big, thick book. He does tend to focus on the pictures, but I do tend to see his eyes dancing. He wants the characters to move like they would on a video screen!

And here is the problem with the pandemic and COVID. There is just way too much time on screens. I truly believe that they should be able to read both in English and Korean. They truly believe that they should be able to watch their screens whenever they want. Even during the enchanted hour.

What do you do to get your kids to read?

Children's Day is May 5th in South Korea. It is a day to go outside and play games with your children. Most of these games are free and there are many, many places to go that are completely free. In many ways it is a great event, but it took some getting used to. 

Almost every year we have gone to Korea National University of Education and played a number of games in competition with other boys and girls. There is face-painting, soccer practice, pin-the-tail on the donkey, and others. I am sure you are getting the themes here. Arts and crafts, sports, and party games. And science. There are lots of science stations. 

I do remember one year my husband got very excited! "We are almost finished! If we go for another hour, they can get a prize!"

Usually we last about 2 hours and becomes puddles in the heat. The weather was a little bit better that day, I was the one who wanted to go home until he said that. I was really curious what the prize was.

It turned out that the prizes were educational books. Korea has some super series for kids. The Why? series goes through all kind of questions from a scientific perspective explaining all kinds of things. They also have many, many readers for English and many, many comic books series. The kids got a Why? book that day and a new comic book.

What will it be like this year with COVID? That really is the problem this time around. Last year they didn't exactly cancel Children's Day, but they did cancel all the events that were being planned.

But we can still get individual presents and have the kids play by themselves. This may sound strange, but it is what we are going to do! Jordan is into soccer, so there are soccer shoes and soccer gloves coming. Aidan is going to get new glasses. 

You might be thinking, what about Justin? He is apparently too old (high school) for such silly nonsense, but I am sure he would smile if we did give him some money. (I know I would smile and say thank you?)

So, we will play Children's Day by ear when it comes next Wednesday. The only thing that I know for sure is that Jordan will be playing soccer!
​

It is good Friday here in South Korea. This is the day Jesus was betrayed. He was betrayed and crucified. The world changes on Sunday. He rises. 

He rises and the world changes.

I imagine myself there sometimes looking at him the way Mary Magdalene did. I watch in horror as he dies before my eyes. 

I also imagine myself looking back on past Easters. I remember what the boys were doing. 

Last year, everyone was in lockdown. All celebrations were on-line. I remember that my eldest, Justin, preached on Genesis and was delighted with the results of his own work. 

I also remember Easter egg hunts and Easter cookies. Aidan and Jordan both had squeals of delight when they realized that there were chocolate eggs all over the house. 

But this is for Easter Sunday. 

________________________

And now it is Saturday of Holy Week. A time when the church keeps its silence. 

Jesus' body is in the tomb. All is quiet. Solemn.

Churches light candles on this day, encouraging reflection and contemplation.

I am thinking and reflecting amidst the busyness of Saturday after a sleepover and company from Seoul. 

I am thinking about how less than reflective I have been for Lent. 

I repent. Once again, God forgives me for not doing enough.

________________________

We are just so blessed that God cares so much about us that he is pleased with the smallest turning towards him.

I am just so blessed that God cares for me.

You are blessed that God cares for you. 

He touches us, transforms us in this moment before Easter Sunday. We are ready to celebrate.

________________________

And this community is what we should keep in mind.

Churches around the world celebrate Easter Sunday.

We are all family because we believe.

We are united because we believe. 

We are changed because we believe. 

​I believe and I am in awe all over again.

We are in the middle of a lockdown because of COVID 19. Everyone is home and we are all driving each other crazy. The boys are fighting while my husband is on the phone with coworkers, and I do not like it all.

I don't like it so much that I actually prayed it was alright for Jesus to take me during the night. 

But I woke up the next morning to find them all fighting again.

What would you do?

I took away their screens. The fighting actually got louder.

I talked to them about getting along with each other. Justin yelled at Aidan and Jordan for not listening.

I yelled at them when the noise was just too much for me to bear it all.

And then I saw something...

In the living room, dog-piled on the new chair, were all three boys lying on each other laughing, playing, and carrying on.

I was shocked!

They were speaking loudly.

Is this just their way? I ask this so quietly I barely heard myself.

That moment is just how my clan rolls.

They fight and argue with each other. It's loud and brash and awful.

They also have loving moments where you are just so surprised that you are witnessing it.

Yesterday, Justin was trying really hard to get Aidan to get the healthy rice that was served for lunch. He actually recorded it on his phone.

I did catch both Aidan and Justin laughing later at the video that resulted. Aidan knew how ridiculous he was being.

Jordan had trouble that day with food, which is just him in a nutshell. My baby that had so many food allergies has many food items that he does not like. He has trouble with spaghetti, not enjoying the sauce. He also does not kimchi or kimchi.

Yes, you read that right. He is a Korean kid that does not like kimchi. 

Their stubbornness comes out when they are fighting, but the love they have for each other also spills forth.

And this the blessing of family in all of its unusual glory.

We all have moments where we put things aside, work with the person who is telling us something we really do not want to hear, smile, and keep going.

We are all children of God and we know it.
​
We give because we love each other.

But I really do wish the house was quieter!

​God bless your New Year!
​

The boys and I were doing a Bible study the other night where some genuinely fun and funny things were said. The theme was generosity. I was attempting to teach them that we are to generous with what we have, sharing freely with others.

We were looking at Luke 12:32-34. Jesus was teaching, turns and addresses the disciples about money, possessions, the heart, and the kingdom of God.

I started off my asking them if there were Christian men and women that they admire. Aidan talked about King Solomon.

"King Solomon wanted to be wise and he asked for wisdom and he got it. I think that is cool!"

Justin talked about Lee Tae Seok. "He was a Korean to Africa who taught people how to play musical instruments. Brother Lee. He was also a medical doctor! His whole life was in service to others!"

Jordan was not listening well. He asked, "What is a Christian?" I answered that it was someone who believed in Jesus. He smiled and said, "Mommy!" I knew it was more about not knowing anyone except immediate family. 

What is the "kingdom" God has given to us? Aidan thought it over for a minute and decided the kingdom was a big house where we would all live. Justin also thought about it and said that the kingdom of God was all around us. Jordan just looked confused. He had no idea what to say. In the end, I got a smile and a "Good" out of him.

Another question I asked was this. What does Jesus mean he says to pursue "purses...that will not wear out"? Aidan admitted that he just wanted sure about that. Justin voiced something about Soviet Union and communism where everyone shared what they had. I told him it was a good thought but that had not worked out in reality. Jordan, again, just looked confused.

How can your heart be in heaven? Aidan and Justin both thought that if we think about others, our hearts would be in heaven. Jordan was not listening at this point.

"For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Luke 12:34.

I have always loved these words. There are just so things that one can treasure that have nothing to do with money.

We ended the study asking God to help us make deposits in our heavenly bank accounts. We prayed specifically to give up some things so we would have more to give to the poor.

Interestingly, right after the Bible study, everyone went back to their treasure. Justin was watching his phone, Jordan was watching his device, and Aidan decided to do the dishes. I was reading on my Kindle.

What is your treasure?

,Most of the time my children behave quite well. During Bible study the other night, that was not the case. 

The Bible study was Colossians 3:15-17. This is about the Colossian church. The Colossian church was vulnerable to divisiveness, so Paul instructs them to set aside the old way of life, and to put on the new self in Christ in order to live in peace and love. It's a lesson in encouraging one another, using only words that build up and bless others.

I started by having everyone say one thing they are thankful for about everyone else that was around the table. Aidan started and began well enough. He told Jordan that he was thankful for his smile to which Jordan grinned really widely. He told me that he was thankful for a Mom that could cook so well. and then he said that Justin was smart.

Then it was Justin's turn. His upper half was lying on the table. He sort of looked up and said, "Aidan! Good! Jordan! Good! Mommy! Good!" while giving everyone a thumbs up. The other boys thought this was funny and laughed. 

When it was Jordan's turn he followed Justin. "Mom! Good! Justin! Good! Aidan! Good!" with a thumbs up. 

I was not impressed. Both Justin and Jordan were told to do it again. Justin looked at me confused as to why this was not the time to make a joke! 

We managed to get through the introduction and then worked on the actual text. 

I asked, "How do you 'let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts'?" 

Aidan launched into Christ always being in his heart. He could do it.

I left this alone and asked another question. "How do you 'let the word of Christ dwell in you richly'?"

They all looked at me confused. Justin was still lying on the table. He again said, "Good!" Again, the boys laughed and I told Justin that he needed to behave himself.

"What about memorizing scripture?" I asked. I started singing a song from an old Slugs and Bugs album that I knew they would all remember. It took about 10 seconds for everyone to clime in.

Justin, again, put up his thumb and said, "Good!" At this point I was really angry.

"Why are you doing that when we are talking about encouragement and building each other up? How is that supposed to help? Can you take this seriously?"

I decided to try again. "Why is being thankful so important?"

Jordan answered first. "It makes people happy!"

"That's a good thought Jordan. If we are thankful, we are positive. We are in the right frame of mind to think about God."

We prayed from there. We prayed for the peace of Christ to rule in our family. We also thanked God for Jesus and the Bible. 

The blessing was that Justin was upright and paying attention. The boys were serious. Maybe, just maybe, they understood that we all need to encourage each other. 

And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
Colossians 3:15-17

Autumn is definitely here. The weather is a little colder. The air is a little crisper. And the most telling sign is that the leaves on the trees are starting to turn their beautiful shades of crimson, gold, and orange hues. It's just glorious!

I heard there are only two seasons from a friend this week. There is autumn and waiting for autumn. I completely understand...

As well, it is Chuseok here. Chuseok, of  course, is Korean thanksgiving. It's a three days holiday this year. The boys are loving all the free time. I can see the gleeful look on their faces when they wake up and realize there are no lessons and they get to do what they want.

Except for yesterday morning! We took a walk down by Kobok Reservoir. My husband was insisting on the boys getting some exercise before they vegged out with books or screens in the afternoon. We toured the board walk which circles much of the reservoir and we took over two hours to go through it all. 
​

Justin was very talkative as we walked. He told me all about a special class he has where feminists come in and teach him and the other boys at his school. I got to hear all about why he thinks feminism is a good idea but does not enjoy this special class.

Aidan was great as well. He ran way ahead while Justin and I walked very slowly. He was excited about spending his pocket money at the grocery store at the end of the walk. He loves to treat people, and I got a fresh lemonade.

Jordan made my heart melt near the end of the walk. He was lagging behind because his brothers were making fun of him. He put his little hand on my arm and wanted to touch and rub it. I let him do this and I hugged him close. We walked like this for a while. We eventually came to a special part of the reservoir where we saw ducks resting on logs. It took a moment, but I also turtles resting on a different set of logs. I said, "Look at that!" to Jordan. He looked, he blinked, and then, "Oh!" with a very slow exhale.

And there we stayed for a quiet moment just watching the birds and the turtles take a rest on the logs. Jordan was wide-eyed and taking it all in. We did eventually catch up with the others...

This was my family on Sunday with their masks off! We were trying to get a family shot for a church project. The boys had some fun with it since we were near the swings. And my husband is kind of smiling here... 

I have to admit, I like my schedule right now. I teach in the mornings. I organize and plan in the afternoons. And I just sit and encourage little boys in the evenings. It has been much easier and I am thankful!

The other night when we were getting ready for bed some cute things happened. We were having our usual story time, which takes anywhere from 30 minutes to two hours. Aidan started it as we were reading Mr. Putter and Tabby Paint the Porch. 

"I hear Daddy eating ramyun! I want some!"

"I don't think so, Aidan. I think Daddy said 'Amen'!" I was trying to keep him in the bedroom, so I said, "I'll go check."

Daddy was seated in front of the television. There was no ramyun in sight!

"Aidan, there is no ramyun. You need to go to sleep!"

"I smell it! I want some!"

He came out to an empty kitchen and no spicy smells from anywhere!

"There's no ramyun! I am so disappointed." He looked completely dejected, but he did go to sleep five minutes later.

Jordan had memorized a Bible Verse and was quoting it five minutes earlier while we were reading stories. When I was finished the story, I had him read it in Korean. The child reads super fast! He read it aloud at a ridiculously fast pace and I laughed hysterically at the mistakes he was making!

He just smiled and said, "I love you Mom! I have to read! Here I go!" 

And there went the freight train! He was a blur and he was incredibly quick with it! He did lie down and breath shortly after he did that!

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The quiet hour is not that quiet.

Justin likes to come in just as everyone is sleepy and tease and tickle his brothers. 

It can get incredibly loud as I hear giggles coming from the bedroom. I usually smile at this part of the evening.

It is astounding how this always turns into wrestling. It's when I hear screaming that I come into the bedroom. I pretend I am angry, and end up telling Justin to leave.

We pray before we go to sleep. This seems to be the sign for everyone to calm down and stop talking.

That's usually when I cuddle Jordan while he squirms and try to catch a few ZZs. 

I will both lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, LORD, make me live in safety. Psalm 4:8 (CSB)

When is your quiet hour? ;)

This month there was relief from CoVid 19. The boys have gone back to school. My husband has gone back to work. Everyone is being careful to not get infected.

Just as spirits were beginning to rise, I watched the video of George Floyd being killed by the police. I looked at my children differently that night. I was thankful for their lives. I was thankful for the fact that we are very far removed from what is going on. I was just thankful.

I was also a little disturbed. The boys and my hubby carried on as usual. I was disturbed because it seems like I was the only person who was thinking about George Floyd. I was also thinking about Breanna and the myriad of other names that we should know but the memories have faded.

I was more than a little curious about race relations when I was a teenager. My mother had encouraged me to read To Kill a Mockingbird. I remember being enraptured by that world. I also read Cry the Beloved Country, a novel about apartheid in South Africa that was just as beautiful and poignant as To Kill a Mockingbird. 

Justin and I had a conversation about George Floyd and it went something like this:

"You are blessed Justin."
"Why?"
"You look Caucasian."
"I suppose I do. No yellow here!"

God bless that child for making jokes.

Aidan looked at the TV screen carefully. He took it in with his eyes. They flickered and he scrunched his nose. He didn't say anything. 

Jordan was not in the room when the rest of us saw the video. He was playing a game somewhere. I am not sure he would have understood that the officer had been on the man's neck for nine minutes. He probably would have thought it was a video game of some kind. 

We turned off the screens for a while. We turned them back on and saw all the demonstrations that were taking place all over the world. 

The following week KOTESOL, a non-profit for English teachers, put out a statement saying that black lives do matter. I was a little stunned, but thought it was good that people were being supportive of what was going on in the U.S..

Was the situation accentuated by CoVid 19? I think the fact that so many people were at home has made it a reality. 

It rocked my world. Why wouldn't it rock somebody else's?

In the end, I pray. 

I ask the kids to pray.

Everything about 2020 has been disturbing. 

It started with classes I was taking.

Then it was CoVid 19.

Then it was 19 hours teaching a week while taking a class online.

Then it was George Floyd. 

Then it was a CoVid 19 scare. 

I pray for change.

I pray in the morning. 

I pray during the day.

I pray at night.

I pray for my family.

I pray for people who are living in poverty.

I pray for people who need a little assistance.

I pray for black lives.

I pray for leaders.

I thank God for all the good, small things around me.

I pray to God for all the terrible, horrible things that I know need change. 

I pray.

I pray for Justin, Aidan, and Jordan. 

Praying is starting to feel like breathing.

And that is really what I want you to know.

Love and justice are trying to breathe.

Amen.